I had my daughter Lunabella August 22, 2015. The last time I weighed myself I was 180. To be honest I probably was a few pounds over that when went in to have her.
It wasn’t until after she was born that I began to feel uncomfortable. I had never been that size before. Even after having my son I wasn’t that much. I honestly felt sad like I let myself down. I hadn’t realized it was as simple as changing my mindset.
Losing weight was not about meeting other people’s expectations. I wanted to lose the weight to be healthy and feel good about myself. So many people base their worth off of a number they see on the scale. It can be really discouraging to be stuck in that mentality(I had bulimia earlier in life so I can really relate to feeling bogged down by the scale). I try to tell everyone I know that it is important to love yourself no matter what. If you can accept yourself in your body regardless of where you are in your health / fitness journey it’s going to make the process so much easier.
As I lost each pound my self confidence went up. This is not to say that losing weight is what made me confident. I felt rewarded. The hard work I was putting in every day was working. I started slowly working out again at 4 weeks postpartum. I literally spent 5 months working for it. Every time I wanted to quit I looked at my kids. I wanted them to have a mom that was strong, beautiful and represented health. I never want my kids to struggle with body image or self love.
Children see, children do. If you aren’t happy with yourself (health/body) don’t think your kids don’t see that. If you are spending time hating yourself…what do you think that will teach your kids? I choose to teach my children self love.
I may of been losing weight but I was also losing negative thoughts towards myself. Going through pregnancy and delivery is not easy. It’s hard on your body and mind. It was a lot of work to let go of what I thought I should be and just accept myself for where I was at. Not only did I gain strength but I gained the most important thing of all…love. I learned to love my body. I chose to tell myself every day “you are beautiful”, “your body birthed two children, you are amazing”. Trust me there were many days I thought I was lying to myself. It was hard. I didn’t give up. I kept telling myself those things. Even battling postpartum depression I kept choosing to tell myself those things and kept doing positive things for myself each day. When people say “you become what you think” it’s true. I quickly started to see myself in a different way. Instead of feeling like “crap I have so much weight to lose” I felt happy. I was at peace. It was going to be a journey and take time but it wasn’t a race. By choosing to love myself I found happiness. Not only did I gain strength physically but mentally as well.
I will always think it’s important to be healthy. Part of being healthy (to me) is to keep up with fitness. You must get your blood pumping and move your body. Use what you were given! Don’t make excuses to be lazy. It’s not doing any good for you.
Although I’ve lost 50 lbs I’m not done. Fitness isn’t just about losing X amount of weight and then that’s it you are done. It’s a part of life. Something you do every day. It feels good! It’s a positive thing! You make time to do it not just for your physical body but for your inner peace, love and happiness.
You must choose love that’s where it starts. Love your body and it will love you back.